My health has not been great recently. My fibromyalgia has been flaring up badly (for which I am mercifully and finally about to start some new treatment) and I've been having very bad stress related migraines (the last one lasted 5 days). Consequently I have felt unable to get on my mat every single day as I would like, and then I become more stressed and the cycle continues. It has taken every ounce of strength I have to teach my classes.
Whilst I feel I cannot let my clients and students down, if I am making myself ill then I am going to end up letting them down eventually. So I have decided, much to my regret (but also to slight relief), to give up the Yoga for Cancer class I teach on Fridays on a voluntary basis at the Mulberry Centre. Much as teaching this class has brought me great joy and I have learned much, I feel that right now I have to put my own health and my treatment first.
Besides as Andy and I have decided that 2010 will be the year we move back to Cambridge to be near my family, I will gradually have to start letting my classes go -- and find somebody who is interested enough to buy my business. That's going to be a hard thing to let go of. Not quite ready yet.....
_______________________
In other news, a colleague and I (a colleague incidentally who would be perfect to take my business over from me, she just doesn't know it yet) are trying to get the local Council to release funding to allow Yoga for Pregnancy classes for pregnant teenagers in the area. We propose working with trained psychologists who are already employed by the Council and hope to get £1000 for a pilot project.....
Fingers crossed.
And finally I must update the other blog. I've been working on some lovely modifications for people with back pain and scoliosis. I'll get on to that tomorrow!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
The light is filtering through
I have been feeling kind of numb lately. I guess that's why I've not been updating that much. Since Christmas I have felt stuck in a rut, uneffected by anything, emotionless. Both my yoga practice and my teachign have felt rather jaded. I read quite a few blogs of people who are just starting out on their yoga teacher training and are filled with such excitement and anticipation and I remember that feeling and I envy them. Because somewhere along the line yoga teaching becomes a job like any other and like any job, some days I'm afraid you just don't want to do it. But it doesn't have to be this way. I just have to remember where to find my inspiration.
Partly it's the fibromyalgia fog, which has been particularly bad, and partly it's the pain, which has also been particularly bad and partly I suspect it is the time of year. January and February always seem so bleak, with so little to look forward to.
But now March is here and the crocus and daffodils are in bloom and there is hope of summer.
My epiphany happened this morning during my early morning yoga practice. The sun was filtering in through the gap in the curtains lighting up a ray of dust motes (and the ubiquitous cat hair) in the air and suddenly I realised "life isn't so bad". Life is not a rollercoaster of excitement, there are things I have wanted to achieve that I have been unable to do, but I do run my own yoga business and I do make a difference to my students. I need to focus much more on the simple things, the little things. And then life is sweeter.
So today I take my inspiration from the sunshine and the fresh air. From a cup of Earl Gray and a piece of fruitcake. From the simple pleasures of the world around me.
Partly it's the fibromyalgia fog, which has been particularly bad, and partly it's the pain, which has also been particularly bad and partly I suspect it is the time of year. January and February always seem so bleak, with so little to look forward to.
But now March is here and the crocus and daffodils are in bloom and there is hope of summer.
My epiphany happened this morning during my early morning yoga practice. The sun was filtering in through the gap in the curtains lighting up a ray of dust motes (and the ubiquitous cat hair) in the air and suddenly I realised "life isn't so bad". Life is not a rollercoaster of excitement, there are things I have wanted to achieve that I have been unable to do, but I do run my own yoga business and I do make a difference to my students. I need to focus much more on the simple things, the little things. And then life is sweeter.
So today I take my inspiration from the sunshine and the fresh air. From a cup of Earl Gray and a piece of fruitcake. From the simple pleasures of the world around me.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Why Yoga wasn't one of my six things!
My last post was a meme from K about 6 things that make me happy. You may have noticed that yoga was not one of them. You'd think that someone who gave up their career to share yoga with as many people as possible would put yoga at the top of the list....however....
The list was 6 things that make me happy - and somehow yoga is much more than that. You see yoga doesn't always automatically make me happy in the same way as writing does, or reading a good book. Sometimes yoga is a huge struggle. Sometimes it almost breaks me to drag my carcass out of bed at 7am and get on my mat every day. Sometimes the pain from my fibromyalgia is so bad the thought of doing yoga is too much.
But over the years I have come to realise that just by getting on my mat I feel better - body and soul. But better doesn't always equate to happy. Sometimes my yoga practice makes me question the limitations of my body, my health, even my own mortality. Sometimes my practice makes me cry. Yoga works on so many deep energetic levels that it equates to so much more than happiness. Yoga is a part of my day, part of me. Everything....
Yoga allows me to live with being me. Being me doesn't always make me happy, but it does make me be....
The list was 6 things that make me happy - and somehow yoga is much more than that. You see yoga doesn't always automatically make me happy in the same way as writing does, or reading a good book. Sometimes yoga is a huge struggle. Sometimes it almost breaks me to drag my carcass out of bed at 7am and get on my mat every day. Sometimes the pain from my fibromyalgia is so bad the thought of doing yoga is too much.
But over the years I have come to realise that just by getting on my mat I feel better - body and soul. But better doesn't always equate to happy. Sometimes my yoga practice makes me question the limitations of my body, my health, even my own mortality. Sometimes my practice makes me cry. Yoga works on so many deep energetic levels that it equates to so much more than happiness. Yoga is a part of my day, part of me. Everything....
Yoga allows me to live with being me. Being me doesn't always make me happy, but it does make me be....
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Six Things
I do hundreds and thousands of memes over on my LJ blog, but never here, mostly because I dont' think enough people read it to tag me. However K in her Square One Blog has tagged me! Yay!
Link to the person who has tagged you.Write down six things that make you happy.Post the rules, tag six others and let them know you did it.Then tell the person when your entry is complete.
1. Writing. This takes on many guises. I have always fancied myself as a novelist - I have one finished and two unfinished novels yearning for a publisher (although yearning won't actually get them out there). I write poetry (I have no idea how bad or good it is), I write every night in a paper journal and have several different blogs. On top of that I've written several articles for yoga magazines and am trying to write a book about yoga and scoliosis/chronic pain - the drafts of which are here. Basically I just can't stop myself writing. It makes me happy and has a certain cathartic effect as well.
2. Reading. I've always been addicted to a good story. I like anything with a hint of magic and the supernatural and good historical fiction. I am also a sucker for old fashioned crime stories (Agatha Christie, Dorothy Sayers, Colin Dexter). My favourite genre is Victorian gothic and end of the century novels and I am especially loving the new wave of this from modern authors such as Michael Cox.
3. Cooking. I can and will cook anything and I love it. I am very unmethodical, hardly ever follow recipes and make up my own stuff all the time. I have cooked and baked since I was a child. I am passionate about good food, organically ethically sourced ingredients and cooking everything from scratch. I love experiementing with flavours and on top of all that I love to eat the results :D
4. The sound of the sea. I don't actually have to even see the sea, just hearing the waves lap against the shore is enough for me. I feel at home, at one, comfortable, relaxed when I can hear the sea. Seeing the sea of course is even better, inhaling the ozone, feeling sand between my toes. It's a little part of the world where I can actually feel content and one of the reasons I miss Australia.
5. Cambridge. The town I grew up in. The town I did my Masters degree in. It always feels like my town. My health is always slightly better there. I love the ancient alleyways, the antiquarian bookshops, the market, the fact it still has record and vintage clothes fairs. I am looking forward to being in a position to move back there next year.
6. The Foo Fighters. This is perhaps the most important one really. If in doubt play the Foos. It is guaranteed to ALWAYS cheer me up. Every girl needs a fangirl crush and an obsession to get through the days and Dave Grohl and the Foos is mine :)
I'm not going to tag because I think only a few people regularly read this blog! If you do do it though please let me know!
Link to the person who has tagged you.Write down six things that make you happy.Post the rules, tag six others and let them know you did it.Then tell the person when your entry is complete.
1. Writing. This takes on many guises. I have always fancied myself as a novelist - I have one finished and two unfinished novels yearning for a publisher (although yearning won't actually get them out there). I write poetry (I have no idea how bad or good it is), I write every night in a paper journal and have several different blogs. On top of that I've written several articles for yoga magazines and am trying to write a book about yoga and scoliosis/chronic pain - the drafts of which are here. Basically I just can't stop myself writing. It makes me happy and has a certain cathartic effect as well.
2. Reading. I've always been addicted to a good story. I like anything with a hint of magic and the supernatural and good historical fiction. I am also a sucker for old fashioned crime stories (Agatha Christie, Dorothy Sayers, Colin Dexter). My favourite genre is Victorian gothic and end of the century novels and I am especially loving the new wave of this from modern authors such as Michael Cox.
3. Cooking. I can and will cook anything and I love it. I am very unmethodical, hardly ever follow recipes and make up my own stuff all the time. I have cooked and baked since I was a child. I am passionate about good food, organically ethically sourced ingredients and cooking everything from scratch. I love experiementing with flavours and on top of all that I love to eat the results :D
4. The sound of the sea. I don't actually have to even see the sea, just hearing the waves lap against the shore is enough for me. I feel at home, at one, comfortable, relaxed when I can hear the sea. Seeing the sea of course is even better, inhaling the ozone, feeling sand between my toes. It's a little part of the world where I can actually feel content and one of the reasons I miss Australia.
5. Cambridge. The town I grew up in. The town I did my Masters degree in. It always feels like my town. My health is always slightly better there. I love the ancient alleyways, the antiquarian bookshops, the market, the fact it still has record and vintage clothes fairs. I am looking forward to being in a position to move back there next year.
6. The Foo Fighters. This is perhaps the most important one really. If in doubt play the Foos. It is guaranteed to ALWAYS cheer me up. Every girl needs a fangirl crush and an obsession to get through the days and Dave Grohl and the Foos is mine :)
I'm not going to tag because I think only a few people regularly read this blog! If you do do it though please let me know!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Choices
I had to make a decision this year. I had to decide which of my classes to cut back on.
During the last 6 months of 2008 I was teaching 2 regular flow classes a week, 1 gentle yoga class, 2 pregnancy yoga classes, 1 mum and baby class and a voluntary class at a cancer centre. It was too much. I was so drained that I wasn't giving any of the classes my best shot and I was bringing the wrong sort of energy to my students.
So I decided to merge the two pregnancy classes and run a booking system - first come first served - and to give up one other class.
I ummed and ahhhed about giving up the voluntary work, but it gives me so much happiness to know I am putting something back (no such thing as a selfless good deed after all) that I couldn't do that. So I had to look at my least lucrative class.
Mum and baby yoga. Not so much that I don't have a lot of interest, but more because of the nature of being a new mum it is very hard to commit to a weekly class and whilst 6 or 7 people would sign up for the class only 2 or 3 would turn up each week. So much as it breaks my heart to do it and much as I love the little ones, I have decided for now to put my mum and baby classes on hold.
My yoga teaching is going in a completely different direction to the way I thought it would. I thought I wanted to teach children, but I am finding myself going further and further down the yoga therapy route and I must follow my heart here. I've enjoyed teaching the babies but I have to give it up to put the right sort of energy back into my other classes.
During the last 6 months of 2008 I was teaching 2 regular flow classes a week, 1 gentle yoga class, 2 pregnancy yoga classes, 1 mum and baby class and a voluntary class at a cancer centre. It was too much. I was so drained that I wasn't giving any of the classes my best shot and I was bringing the wrong sort of energy to my students.
So I decided to merge the two pregnancy classes and run a booking system - first come first served - and to give up one other class.
I ummed and ahhhed about giving up the voluntary work, but it gives me so much happiness to know I am putting something back (no such thing as a selfless good deed after all) that I couldn't do that. So I had to look at my least lucrative class.
Mum and baby yoga. Not so much that I don't have a lot of interest, but more because of the nature of being a new mum it is very hard to commit to a weekly class and whilst 6 or 7 people would sign up for the class only 2 or 3 would turn up each week. So much as it breaks my heart to do it and much as I love the little ones, I have decided for now to put my mum and baby classes on hold.
My yoga teaching is going in a completely different direction to the way I thought it would. I thought I wanted to teach children, but I am finding myself going further and further down the yoga therapy route and I must follow my heart here. I've enjoyed teaching the babies but I have to give it up to put the right sort of energy back into my other classes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
